Monday, March 18, 2013

Am I raising a family of Lawyers?

So I'm realizing that my littlest boys (Gabe - age 5, and Elijah - age 3) are both very different in a lot of ways. 

Gabe is sensitive.  He will be the first to tears if something hurts his feelings, or if the wresting gets a little too rough (and with a family full of boys there is plenty of that).  He is a people pleaser.  He will look for your reaction first before he answers, wanting everyone to be happy.  And he takes it personally when people are upset.  He plays with video games, and loves movies like Harry Potter that involve fantasy worlds, etc. He has never liked sports, or anything that he can get knocked down or hurt. 

Elijah, I think, was born a superhero.  A rough, tough, version of The Incredible Hulk.  He's built like a brick house (unlike gabe, who is built like a bean pole).  He watches superhero movies, has every action figure made, loves dinosaurs (because they're tough and they go "raur!," and wakes up every morning as a new character.  Example - the other morning I call out -

"Elijah!  Breakfast!" 
Elijah - "Me Batman!"
Me - "Batman, Breakfast!"
Elijah - "Yes!  Breakfast"

Later in the day, Elijah gets a timeout for attacking his brother relentlessly and not listening when told to stop.  He goes to his room for the appropriate time and then I yell:

"OK Elijah you may come out now"
Elijah - "OK"
Elijah comes upstairs and walks past us with a Teanage Mutant Ninja Turtle Sword stuck in the back of his shirt.
Me - "Elijah, come here please"
Elijah - "What"
Me - "who are you"
Elijah - "I'm a Ninja Turtle, see"
He slowly reaches behind his back and pulls the sword out, and poses for us.
Me - "ok, thank you. you may go."
Elijah - "OK"
He walks back into the living room

This brings me to my point.  One thing they both seem to have in common.  Their negotiation skills.  When in trouble, or in a bind, they seem to be able to pull out these skills (or at least perceived skills) of negotiation.  Gabriel can talk circles around any situation until even I am confused about what my point was.  Example (Gabe refused to share his toys but insisted Elijah share his bike)

Me - "Gabe, that's Elijah's bike."
Gabe - "He said I could ride it."

Me - "no, you wouldn't share your legos with him.  Just because you convinced him to let you ride it, doesn't mean it's fair."
Gabe - "Here Elijah, you can play with this Lego.  Isn't it cool?  Can I ride your bike?"
Elijah - "Yeah!"
Me - [sigh] - "Gabe" [giving the mom look]
Gabe - [smiling up at me]
Elijah - [smiling up at me]

Later that day ...

(trying to potty train Elijah)

Me - "Elijah, time to use the potty"
Elijah - "No, me a spider.  Spiders dont have butts.  So, they can't use the potty."




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